If you’ve been here or been following along with our study on The Lord’s Prayer, you may assume our topic today will be Matthew 6:12 NIV “And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.”
In the interest of time, we are going to skip that verse and go on to verse 13 because, truthfully, how many of us really need a lesson on forgiveness – either receiving or giving?
Haha! Just kidding! In fact, this is probably the most difficult line for us in the Lord’s Prayer.
We’ve discussed that Jesus said we are to pray using The Lord’s Prayer as a template. That’s not to say that it’s wrong to pray The Lord’s Prayer, but you can see where we could be insincere, thoughtless, and even robotic if we only recited The Lord’s Prayer.
“This reference to sin and forgiveness, in fact, is one reason some commenters dislike calling this passage the “Lord’s Prayer.” Strictly speaking, these are Jesus’ instructions on how to pray (Matthew 6:9), not something He was actually praying, Himself. More importantly, as one who was tempted but without sin (Hebrews 4:15; 2 Corinthians 5:21), the request made in the verse is one Jesus would never have prayed. What we call this passage doesn’t really matter; however, it’s worth remembering that the “Lord’s Prayer” is the Lord’s model for our prayers, not a prayer the Lord prayed.”[i]
Verse 12 addresses a challenging aspect of our prayers: admitting our shortcomings. We sin. We know we sin. But we don’t often relish the idea of addressing our sin.
If, as a child, you did something wrong, did you do your best to avoid your parents? I did! I’d go straight to my room, shut the door, and pretend that I had a mound of homework, or I’d be suddenly very anxious to clean or rearrange my room! I would do anything to keep from interacting with one or both of my parents.
I don’t know if all dogs do this, but my two grandpups certainly do. They’ll avoid eye contact if they do something they know they’re not supposed to do. They’ll go into a corner and not snuggle with me or follow me around the house. They will keep this up until I discover what it is they’ve done and dealt with it. Once I’ve disciplined them (which could hardly be classified as discipline – they are my grandpups, after all!), and loved on them, all is well and they will return to their normal behavior.
It’s that acknowledgment of the simple fact that we’ve done something wrong that is incredibly uncomfortable for us. We should have known better! We didn’t mean to. Or, I didn’t know what I was thinking! And so, we play hide, don’t seek because we would rather avoid the problem rather than be void of the problem. We can beat ourselves up for the wrongs that we’ve done, but God said, “I have wiped out your wrongdoings like a thick cloud And your sins like a heavy mist. Return to Me, for I have redeemed you.” (Isaiah 44:22 NASB)
But have you ever gone to pray and you cover the praise and worship portion, you ask for your needs to be provided for, you pray for others, and then before closing out with a hearty “amen” you realize you probably need to ask forgiveness for something, but you can’t think of anything you’ve done wrong?
We often sin unknowingly, not just by wrongdoing but by neglecting to do good. This can happen when we ignore someone in need or fail to pray for them. Our ignorance of sin doesn’t excuse our sin. The Holy Spirit is ready, willing, and able to convict us when what we do (or fail to do) is displeasing to God. We just need to be attentive to be made aware of our wrongdoings.
Unfortunately, because of this wicked and evil world we live in, we’ve developed a high tolerance for sin. What should drop us to our knees in repentant prayer is shrugged off as being justified or benign. We overlook and sugarcoat our debts and our transgressions because we don’t use the correct measuring tool. We purposefully compare ourselves to someone who is, in our opinion, less righteous. And because we use someone whose sin quota, if you will, is higher than our own, we end up feeling pretty good about ourselves and don’t feel as if we have anything that needs forgiving.
I bought some rulers from Temu to help with some of my creations. I bought them because I was always misplacing the rulers I had purchased from Walmart or Amazon. These rulers on Temu were like .19 each which was a fraction of what I had previously paid. I believe I was cutting ribbon and had used one of the cheap rulers from Temu to measure out what I needed. But it turned out too short. I held up the ribbon against the ruler to see what I had done wrong, but the end was matching up to where I needed it to be. It wasn’t until I found an accurate ruler that I discovered the Temu ruler was completely missing more than an inch. The numbers were something like 1 inch, 2 inch, 3 inch, 5 inch, 6 inch. There was no way of getting an accurate measurement using the Temu ruler! If I had used one of my original rulers, I wouldn’t have made that mistake. But because I used a cheap, faulty substitute, I was fooled and I wasted my time and resources.
You see, when it comes to the act of sinning, we tend to use cheap, faulty substitutes to compare ourselves. One of the enemy’s favorite tools is to pull out that Temu ruler of righteousness so that we have a warped view of what we should be measuring up to. We may not say it out loud but we’re thinking, “Well, at least what I did wasn’t nearly as bad as what so- and-so did.”
Case in point. The prodigal son. We are familiar with the story. A man has two sons. The younger son wants his inheritance now. He takes what is given to him, runs away, lives his life as he desires- sinfully – and squanders all that he has. He comes to realize the mistake he’s made and seeks to return to his father.
Of course, we know, the father is watching for his son’s return. He runs out to greet him, orders the fatted calf to be killed for he is throwing a huge party. It’s a great story, but that’s just part of it.
The older son hears the music and sounds of dancing. He asks a servant what is happening and it is then that he is told of his brother’s return. Out of all of the emotions he could be feeling, he becomes angry and refuses to attend the party.
When his dad comes out to beg him to join the celebration, he rejects the invitation, spouts off a list of comparisons between him and his brother, and complains that he has not been treated equally. There is animosity, bitterness, and unforgiveness because he used a faulty measuring tool that warped his perception of the situation. Instead of rejoicing in the reunion, he was cynical in the celebration.
Galatians 6:4 NLT “Pay careful attention to your own work, for then you will get the satisfaction of a job well done, and you won’t need to compare yourself to anyone else.”
Now on to the second part of verse 12.
If we were to recite The Lord’s Prayer together without looking at it in writing, we’d most likely be in sync until we get to verse 12. Depending on how we were raised, we’d either use the word debts, trespasses, or sins.
Here’s a question for you. Have you ever prayed that God would forgive you as you have forgiven others? An example would be, “Father, please forgive me for gossiping about my neighbor just as I forgave my husband for not taking the trash out when I asked him to.” Or, “Dear Father, please forgive me for lying about having plans this weekend as I forgave my co-worker for using the last of the coffee creamer.” We probably don’t do that, do we?
But the verse is “And forgive us our debts,
as we also have forgiven our debtors.” (Matthew 6:12 NIV) Simply put, the petition is for God to forgive us in the same regard that we have forgiven others. They go hand in hand. God uses the same measuring cup.
Luke 6:37-38 ESV. “Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven; give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.”
Jesus is asked about forgiving others and He tells a parable about a king who wishes to settle some accounts with his servants. One servant, we are told, owes the king 10,000 talents. That’s equivalent to 13.2 trillion dollars! Obviously the servant doesn’t have it and the king says the servant and his family must be sold in order to repay him. The servant pleads for mercy and Jesus said the king was compassionate and merciful and forgave the loan.
That same servant, the recipient of mercy worth more than 13 trillion dollars came across a fellow servant who owed him 100 denarii. At today’s rate, that’s less than $6.00.[ii] The fellow servant, like the first, begged for mercy, but the first servant wouldn’t budge. He had him thrown into debtors’ prison.
Word got back to the king. “Then, after he had summoned him, his master said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. Shouldn’t you also have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I had mercy on you? ’ And because he was angry, his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured until he could pay everything that was owed. So also my heavenly Father will do to you unless every one of you forgives his brother or sister from your heart.” Matthew 18:32-35 CSB
There is an interesting word in those verses. Torture. The original servant was turned over to the jailers to be tortured. Not executed. Not simply locked away. But to be tortured because he didn’t forgive in the measure in which he had been forgiven.
Do an exercise with me. Take a deep breath and hold it. Wait a few seconds and take another deep breath without releasing the first deep breath. Do it again. Do it again if you can. You are most likely starting to feel uncomfortable because your lungs can only hold so much air for so long before they begin to hurt. Your lungs have only so much capacity so there’s relief when you can exhale and let it go.
Forgiveness works the same way. God isn’t being cruel when He says He’ll forgive in accordance with how we forgive. He designed us, not to be manufacturers of forgiveness, but distributors. Forgiveness is given to us, and forgiveness is to be given from that same supply. Forgiveness in; forgiveness out.
Unforgiveness doesn’t stay as just unforgiveness. If it did, maybe it wouldn’t be as harmful. Unforgiveness just becomes the soil where bitterness, envy, hatred, a desire for revenge, hostility and judgment grow like weeds. But that’s not all. Unforgiveness can cause our imaginations to go into overdrive. We replay what was said and done and the more we do that, the more we embellish. We start to think of possible scenarios of ‘what ifs’ and we get angrier and more bitter because of things that aren’t real and haven’t happened. Unforgiveness can lead to depression, physical ailments, withdrawal, distrust of others, broken fellowship, torture, and loneliness, not to mention it can hinder our relationship with God.
Matthew West sings a song titled Forgiveness.
“It’s the hardest thing to give away
And the last thing on your mind today
It always goes to those who don’t deserve
It’s the opposite of how you feel
When they pain they caused is just too real
Takes everything you have to say the word
Forgiveness, forgiveness
It flies in the face of all your pride
It moves away the mad inside
It’s always anger’s own worst enemy
Even when the jury and the judge
Say you’ve got a right to hold a grudge
It’s the whisper in your ear saying set it free
Forgiveness, forgiveness
Forgiveness, forgiveness
Show me how to love the unlovable
Show me how to reach the unreachable
Help me now to do the impossible
Forgiveness, forgiveness
Help me now to do the impossible
Forgiveness
It’ll clear the bitterness away
It can even set a prisoner free
There is no end to what its power can do
So let it go and be amazed by what you see through eyes of grace
The prisoner that it really frees is you[iii]
One thing you never have to pray about is whether or not you should forgive someone. God’s answer to that will always be “yes!”
What you probably do need to pray about is asking for God’s help in carrying out the forgiving of someone who has hurt you, harmed you, betrayed you, or just did you dirty because we cannot do that on our own. Remember we cannot manufacture forgiveness any more than we can manufacture love. We are simply distributors of what God gives to us.
“Our hearts and minds do not have a ‘recycle bin’ like our computers, where we can simply drag items there and watch them disappear..”[iv]
God knows that. He knows we cannot do this on our own. Again, it goes back to the daily bread that we talked about last week and being God-reliant instead of self-reliant. Sometimes our daily bread, our basic need is to forgive someone. Forgiveness is not suggested; it is required. It’s a daily need.
Jesus’ messages and interactions often revolved around forgiveness. The Samaritan woman at the well who had multiple husbands left His presence feeling forgiven. Jesus washed the feet of all of His disciples knowing fully well that Peter would deny Him and Judas would betray Him. Hanging with nails through His flesh, He asked God to forgive those who put Him in this position.
Jesus knew the idea of forgiveness was something we needed to be reminded of and one that would need to be demonstrated to us time and time again.
Take a look at verses 14 & 15 of Matthew 6. Of all the points in the Lord’s Prayer, Jesus emphasizes just one of them. What was it?
14 For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” Matthew 6:14 NIV
When Jesus was asked by the Pharisees what the greatest commandment was, what did He say? Matthew 22:37 GNT “37 Jesus answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the greatest and the most important commandment. 39 The second most important commandment is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as you love yourself.’ 40 The whole Law of Moses and the teachings of the prophets depend on these two commandments.”
The first and second commandments imply forgiveness. How can we be sure? 1 Corinthians 13:4 CEV “Love is patient and kind,
never jealous, boastful,
proud, or 5 rude.
Love isn’t selfish
or quick tempered.
It doesn’t keep a record
of wrongs that others do.”
As wretched and sinful as we are, God is merciful and generous with His forgiveness. The Bible assures us that God’s forgiveness is as vast and boundless as the distance from the east to the west. His grace wipes away our transgressions, removing them forever from His sight. This divine act of mercy is not just a one-time event but a continuous process because, as Solomon wisely noted, there isn’t a man on earth who doesn’t sin. John reiterates this in his epistle, reminding us that claiming to be without sin is a denial of the truth.
Psalm 103:12 HCSB “As far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us.”
Warren W. Wiersbe said, “You can measure the distance from the north pole to the south pole but not from east to west. It’s a beautiful image of our sins being taken away forever!”[v]
How arrogant of us to believe we are justified in keeping track of how many times others have wronged us!
We don’t get saved by forgiving people. We forgive people because we are saved. We know what it cost for our salvation so “stop making what someone did TO you bigger than what Jesus did FOR you.”
[i] What does Matthew 6:12 mean? | BibleRef.com
[ii] https://www.coingecko.com/en/coins/denarius/usd
[iii] Matthew West – Forgiveness Lyrics | Genius Lyrics
[iv] 9 Myths about Forgiveness That Fool the Best Christians – Guest Commentary
[v] Warren W. Wiersbe, On Earth As It is in Heaven
Beacons of Light 